Anna Nicole Sex Tape In The Wild

In least astonishing news since we found out that Paris Hilton has herpes category comes word from an ex-boyfriend of Anna Nicole Smith that they made a sex tape, reports SFGate.com. The man, Mark Hatten, says he believes it was stolen from her house after Anna’s death. But nothing around Anna-Nicole could be that simple, right? Of course not.

This guy, Mark Hatten, is in prison! He is serving time for “making terrorist threats against Smith and beating up her neighbor”. Geez, sounds like a great guy, but whatever. How the hell does he know it was stolen if he is in prison? Is he doing the whole “I’m ashamed and embarrassed thing” just so he can sell it behind the scenes like every other celebrity does?  I know I really shouldn’t be surprised because it took a week of court hearings just to figure out where to bury her body and we still don’t know who the father is, but I’m going to say it anyway. This just doesn’t make sense.

What does make sense is that there is definitely an Anna-Nicole biopic coming soon. Her life has all the elements - sex, drugs and money. Who would you like to see star as Anna Nicole? I say Scarlett Johansson, but she can’t play everyone - especially if she is doing the upcoming Jenna Jameson flick.